Chemo isn’t easy

Day 1 of chemo Jacob had said “ chemo is easy!”  How I wished and hoped and prayed it would stay easy but that was short lived. The last 3 days have been hard for Jacob. Nausea, no energy, cannot eat or drink. His big contagious smile has faded and he has gone from saying chemo is easy to saying “there was nothing good about today, Mom”.  It is so very tough to watch. My heart is hurting for him and each day that passes the ache seems to grow as I watch him get more sick and weak.

D5CCEB5E-841E-4B4E-9562-6F7E75A7D3D0Around noon today the doctor took Jacob off IV fluids and nausea medication with the hopes we could move to Ronald Macdonald House for the night, come back tomorrow morning for a bloodwork and checkup and then head home if all looked okay. A few hours later it was obvious Jacob was in no condition to leave and they hooked him back up to fluids and meds. He is receiving 4 anti nausea meds now, and he still cannot eat or drink.  We will try again tomorrow and go from there. The Cisplatin he is on for chemo is notorious for causing this and often a delayed nausea reaction. So, another night here, but it’s where we need to be!

73088941-D236-4FA4-AF07-D24D9280BC87Jacob has received many Best Wishes letters delivered by volunteers. Thank you to everyone who took a few minutes to send him an email. It brightens our room and occasionally even gets a smile from Jacob – or at least one corner of his mouth moves a bit.  But even that is good to see right now.

BD4B60A7-66AA-4520-AF2E-8ACD88CE1B6DWe do have a pretty amazing view from our 8th floor room and have been treated to a few beautiful sunsets.  The small things become bigger things right now – and they are needed to help us cope through the difficult days.  Thank you for the continued prayers for Jacob.  💙🎗

14 thoughts on “Chemo isn’t easy”

  1. We never stop praying sis. We love you guys so much and our hearts are breaking with yours. Wishing you strength for tmrw, and all the days following. Hugs to Jacob ♥️

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  2. Dear Tracy and Jacob
    We just can’t imagine what you must be going through these days. Our hearts are with you. We are encouraged by your strong faith in our Lord who is our Healer. Thank you for continually sharing your trust in Him as you walk through these difficult days.
    We’re praying for you constantly.
    Isaiah 40:29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
    Love Auntie Jen and Uncle Rick

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  3. Continuing to pray for you all! We hope Jacob feels a little better today so he can head home for a bit.
    I missed his smile in this post. Lamentations 3
    22 Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. 23 They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

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  4. We continue to remember Jacob and you in our prayers. It all seems so pointless and unfair and cruel at times, doesn’t it? It’s then you need to remind yourselves that despite what you’re feeling, the truth is greater….that God is good, and because He is good, what He does in our lives is good, even when it’s tough, painful and unrelenting….and the truth is He will never leave you nor forsake you, He is with you through the darkest night and the lowest of the lows. Praying you’ll feel His presence, love and comfort.

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  5. Strength for today & bright hope for tomorrow….His compassion never fails.
    praying for this everyday.
    We love you all. ❤
    Mom & Dad

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  6. It’s hard to read this without tearing up.😥 I can’t imagine how difficult this must be. Praying for you as a mom, to be filled with all the strength you need to then pour into your sweet boy. ❤️

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  7. When you look for a silver lining, it’s nearly impossible when you see a small bundle curled up under the blankets. However, in order for the chemo to be effective, it will take a toll that is difficult to bear and to watch. The chemo is working, it’s doing what is necessary. Please tell Jacob he is a warrior. A warrior looks to God for continuing strength, love and support. We will continue to pray for Jacob and his family.

    Ed & Flo de Haan

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  8. But now, this is what the Lord says—
    he who created you, Jacob,
    he who formed you, Israel:
    “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
    I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
    2 When you pass through the waters,
    I will be with you;
    and when you pass through the rivers,
    they will not sweep over you.
    When you walk through the fire,
    you will not be burned;
    the flames will not set you ablaze.
    3 For I am the Lord your God,
    the Holy One of Israel, your Savior; Isaiah 43:1-3

    This chapter was my Bible reading this morning and I thought of you.

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