Chemo- Round 2

2A0E42AC-8DAD-4519-8D3B-470E7ECDC6FAWe began Round 2 today of chemotherapy with the high dose Methotrexate.  Although we really enjoyed the time at home after 17 days in hospital, there’s a heaviness in the house that seems to invade almost everything we do, and the heaviness only got heavier as we got closer to the next round of chemo.  There’s some “beauty” in not knowing what was really coming for the first round, but now that we know the toll it takes on our son, it’s much harder to anticipate and get ready for.  The younger boys are also feeling more down, and more tears are happening from them as we packed up their clothes and blankets and stuffies again.

Our family did really enjoy the “normal” days at home, whatever normal means now even with the weight hanging on our shoulders. We had a family BBQ and friends over, and got a lot of work done around the house and yard.  Jacob had a couple friends over and spent time on his gaming computer chatting with friends, and Jacob and I attended church for the first time in a month.

 

Chemo started this afternoon, and very quickly into it Jacob started coughing and wheezing and getting some hives.  The nurses kept the drip going and monitored more closely but things continued to worsen and after an hour his upper body and head were covered in hives. Because of his prior history of anaphylaxis from bee stings, it was fairly stressful. Benadryl was tried but didn’t seem to help so they added in another medication that quickly took it all away.  He will continue to be on these medications for the next few days as the Methotrexate is still in his body.

 

Because of the toxicity of this drug, he cannot leave the hospital until there is only  trace amount left in his blood.  Tomorrow he will get a “rescue drug” that binds to the methotrexate to get it out of his system as quickly as possible. Then it’s a bit of a waiting game for the levels in his blood to clear.  This round has hit him hard quickly. He has hardly spoken a word since 2 pm. In general he just feels exhausted and doesn’t want to engage with anyone or anything.

4CB6CF1B-3B59-44A6-BD84-55E11D46E044On the way to the hospital this morning we listened to “Even If” by Mercy Me. Last summer I went to their concert and cried during this song because it spoke to me about some other areas in our lives, but now it hits so much harder.  This is one of the worst things I could have ever imagined happening to one of my children.  It’s absolutely heart wrenching. Yet somehow through it all we remain grounded in Christ and his plan and will for our lives, somehow still able to say, It is well with my soul.

“They say it only takes a little faith
To move a mountain
Well good thing
A little faith is all I have, right now
But God, when You choose
To leave mountains unmovable
Oh give me the strength to be able to sing
It is well with my soul
I know You’re able and I know You can
Save through the fire with Your mighty hand
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
I know the sorrow, and I know the hurt
Would all go away if You’d just say the word
But even if You don’t
My hope is You alone
You’ve been faithful, You’ve been good
All of my days
Jesus, I will cling to You
Come what may
‘Cause I know You’re able
I know You can

11 thoughts on “Chemo- Round 2”

  1. Such a hard road! Praying tonight that Jacob recuperates quickly & there are better days ahead.
    His brothers are getting lots of love & hugs, they miss you, Ray & Jacob and are really looking forward to Friday & being together again. But in spite of everything they are a joy to have.

    We read these verses today…..encouragement for all the tomorrows ahead.

    22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
    his mercies never come to an end;
    23 they are new every morning;
    great is your faithfulness.
    Lamentations 3:22-23
    In our hearts and in our prayers! ❤

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  2. Don’t ever be afraid to ask for help through this journey. I’m heading to Phoenix for a week but if you want me to visit your little man when I get back let me know. Not sure if amputation is going to be an option. I feel I got off lucky just having my surgery without chemo or radiation 30 years ago. Sending hugs and prayers to all of you!

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  3. Tracey, that song is on my playlist, it makes me sob every time. So full of promise and hope, yet it speaks to the core of your soul in difficult times. Remain the faithful mom you are, its ok to feel scared, overwhelmed and uncertain. Just always remember God is faithful , even if……this mountain CAN be moved, love and hugs 💜

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  4. We are continually praying for Jacob and your family as you go through this next round. Even in this time of facing these challenges you are never alone, not for one second. Jesus is right there with you every step of the way. He loves you and cares deeply for you. Keep casting your cares on Him! Your comments of holding on to your faith and trust in Him is an inspiration to us all !
    Blessings & Love
    Rick & Jen

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  5. That song carried me through the weeks leading up to and through Martin’s surgery, and still speaks to me today. I sang that song with tears and anguish. I know how hard it is to trust and believe. Praying hard for you all.

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  6. The song Trust in You by Lauren Daigle always makes me think of you guys. Not that I need a reminder really as you are seldom far from my thoughts and prayers.

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  7. May God bear you up and sustain you Tracey and Raymond and bless the treatments to Jacob’s recovery!

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